Editorial by Mr. John Sixpack Everyman
Recent terrestrial broadcast transmissions have indicate that Our Glorious Overlord, Mr. President U.S.A. Obama, has cut funds of NASA and discontinue manned shuttle missions. He wisely choose to stop this foolish and intrusive trespasses outside of Earth atmosphere. I for one am fully agree, as you all must.
We don’t need our human tax monies wasted on funny joke! There is no Life on other solar satellites, duh stupid! Let’s never think this is, or else we are like Mr. Hitler.
Why leave Earth when here is good? We have so many cool shit to be awesome about! How about the Twitter, am I correct? Fuck the congress also LOL! I want my sex in Angelina Jolie! Baseball!
So Hail Mr. Obama President for prudent judgment. Let’s all of us humans all stays here on planet forever and don’t interfere with Grand Works. End communiqué.