Washington, D.C. – Facing increasing scrutiny from sports talk radio and the blogosphere, Vice President Joe Biden and Milwaukee Brewers play-by-play man Bob “Mr. Baseball” Uecker admitted that, for the past month, they have been impersonating each other, prince-and-the-pauper style.
Apparently, Biden had always dreamed of being a sportscaster, and Uecker had always dreamed of being a heartbeat away from the Presidency. With the Brewers being out of postseason contention, and Biden’s role in the Obama Administration getting smaller and smaller, the pair figured no one would notice.
Uecker’s broadcasting partner Cory Provus initially became suspicious when, following Brewers home runs, “Uecker” began replacing his signature catchphrase, “Get up, get up, get outta here… gone!” with variations of “Hooooo-ee! Dude smacked the crap outta that sumbitch!”
Eyebrows were also raised when “Biden,” on a state visit to Spain, presented King Juan Carlos with a gift of Usinger’s bratwursts and a Coleman full of ice-cold Miller Lite. “It tastes great, Your Highness!” the faux-Joe enthused. “And less filling!”
Biden expressed regret that the ruse was exposed before he could realize his ultimate goal of hanging out with Mr. Belvedere.